Reed Siler
When Rachel and Aaron White were planning a trip to Haiti in December 2016, they said to their kids Katelyn and Jake, “We do not see ourselves as a family that will adopt.”
The Whites had friends who had adopted kids from Haiti, and Katelyn and Jake were pushing for a sibling, noting that the family home in 12South had an extra bedroom. But Rachel was resolved that there were other ways their family could be of service to the island country—one of the poorest in the Western Hemisphere. Not long after arriving and visiting an orphanage, the Whites began to bond with two unrelated Haitian boys, Ferlando and Bredens, and Rachel’s edict would become her own famous last words.
Ferlando, then 3, had been diagnosed with retinoblastoma. Due to the limits in available imaging technology, it was unclear how far the cancer had progressed, though he already had lost sight in one eye.
In Nashville, the Whites lived near the Vanderbilt University Medical Center and were confident they could get him the best possible care, so, despite their earlier admonishments, they started the process to adopt both boys. By spring break 2017, Ferlando was in Nashville, and the process to bring Bredens was underway. Ferlando had several months of progress, but, ultimately, the prognosis wasn’t good. The cancer had metastasized. By August 2017 he was in hospice care. Having been referred by a family friend, Make-A-Wish Middle Tennessee reached out several times to see if they could make one of Ferlando’s dreams come true.
“Save it for someone else,” Rachel initially thought. Ferlando would have been overwhelmed by a trip to Disney World, the kind of large-scale wishes she thought Make-A-Wish granted. Over time, she learned that the organization could tailor the experience for Ferlando, who just wanted to spend one Christmas with his adopted family.
When it seemed unlikely he would live until December, the Whites considered putting up a tree and wrapping some gifts. A full Christmas-in-October was daunting on top of the responsibilities of Ferlando’s care and their regular work and school lives.
Eventually Rachel acquiesced. Make-A-Wish Middle Tennessee decked a tree, complete with model train running around the base, ordered Ferlando’s favorite foods (What’s the ultimate Christmas feast for a 4-year-old? Barbecue and grape Nehi) and hung colored lights outside. When neighbors saw what was happening they took down their Halloween decorations and replaced them with their own Christmas lights. Santa and Mrs. Claus brought Ferlando a Superman muscle shirt.
1 of 2
2 of 2
“I have never been so happy that stores started putting out Christmas goods in October,” laughs Beth Torres, president & CEO of Make-A-Wish Middle Tennessee.
Ferlando passed away October 28 that year, but his legacy and the significance of that one wish, stayed with the Whites.
“Before we had the experience with Make-A-Wish I didn’t see it as a necessary ministry. It seemed like a cherry on the top,” Rachel says. “After experiencing the way they pursued our family and offered something I didn’t even know we needed, I feel differently.”
Rachel was particularly touched by how the staff tended to the details, but did so in the background, so that it still felt like an intimate, family affair.
As with many other non-profits, the coronavirus pandemic meant that Make-A-Wish had to pivot. In the past, 80 percent of requested wishes were travel-based, which are difficult to grant now. That means there are more opportunities for activities like Ferlando’s wish, and more opportunities to get involved. Businesses can donate services, such as light-hanging or calligraphy, other than cash.
Torres feels that the restrictions that people have gone through this year—eliminating in-person school, ballet lessons or other sports—has given folks some empathy for what Make-A-Wish families cope with during treatment. Her staff of 10 helps families in 38 Tennessee counties. Any kid who has a qualifying illness is guaranteed a wish; (although with modifications—it is hard to grant a wish to go to Mars, but they can simulate the experience). The non-profit organization, which has chapters worldwide, pays for the wish kid, two adults, and any kids under age 18 who live in the household. About 200 children in Middle Tennessee are awaiting their wish.
Most kids, while facing serious illnesses at the time their wish is granted, do survive. And when they don’t, their stories do.
Today the Whites honor Ferlando by putting up their Christmas lights in October, and Rachel feels the experience taught the family “to keep our eyes and hearts open to ways we can love and serve people around us even if we don’t think we have the skills or resources to do it.”
One last piece of uplifting news from the White family: After three years, Bredens, now 9, was finally able to leave Haiti during the pandemic and joined their family this spring.